Posted in meandering

Joy and sorrow

Read this somewhere recently and thought it was kinda neat:

We can only hold joy as deep as our sorrow has carved us.

And then I got to thinking about it.

The thinking ruined it, but let’s go there anyway.

Like anything, the statement is not 100% accurate.

Some people refuse to feel joy because of their previous sorrows. I know a fair handful of people who just won’t connect with [some demographic of people] because [that demographic of people] hurt them before.

(It doesn’t even matter if it was 10 days or 10 years ago. Or more.)

But maybe the saying is still true in those cases, and they’ve just built themselves a dam, and if they’d take the dam down, the joy would flow where sorrow carved.

OK, so next argument…

Little kids. So. Much. Joy. Not flowing in ravines carved by sorrow. Just joy.

No counterargument. Checkmate.

But the original sentiment struck a chord with me, so let’s go down that little rabbit hole…

I think that’s just because my life has had a lot of sorrow, and it’s a comforting thought that those sorrows created space for joy that would not have existed without them.

A consolation prize, if you will.

It ties in with my post about wanting others to avoid or suffer the same as you. Is it OK for other people to be joyous when they haven’t experienced as much pain?

Well, yes.

Though I admit that sometimes I get snarky about it. (Not usually out loud.)

We need both sides to be able to experience either (people who wall themselves off from potential pain also wall themselves off from happiness), but I don’t think the fullness of joy has deepness of sorrow as a prerequisite.

You?

 

Author:

My name is Heat! (It's short for Heather.) My last name is Polish and has a few Zs in it and it's really just easier this way.